?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry

Borrowed Time (the final parts)

Title: Borrowed Time
Fandom: Doctor Who
Beta:The lovely meghanadxb
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Night of the Doctor
Characters: Eighth Doctor, Cass, The TARDIS
Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who or these characters, no profit was made from this work.
Summary: Her name left his lips like a prayer, they both knew her actions was their salvation, but would she take it or let them burn.





-4-
Island of Light


Cass exhaled, closing her eyes and letting the water surrounding her relax every muscle. The deep claw footed tub resembled an ordinary tub. But it truly wasn’t. She let her head fall back against the porcelain and it softened as a pillow to cradle her head. Sleep began to pull her until the Doctor came bounding in. She let out a surprise yelp and flailed. He seemed rather amused, but she was not.



"Oye! What did I tell you about doing that?!" she yelled, but the joy in his smile quickly made her anger fade.

He apologized, even bowing in show. “I’m sorry. When I brought you here, I thought we would go to the Island of Light, not relax in a spa.”

"I can do both. Borrowed time, remember?"

"Always." The sudden haunted look on his face gave her chills.

The moment passed and the Doctor threatened, “Come out, or I’m coming in.”

"No, you’re not."

He unbuttoned his shirt.

"Doctor!"

He loosened his cravat with his long and nimble fingers. His chest soon became exposed.

"Don’t you dare!”

"Oh, I dare."

Cass’s eyes closed immediately and she listened to the rustle of clothes hit the floor. He slid into the water alongside her. Some of the water sloshed over the sides of the tub as he settled down in front of her, his feet resting on either side of her hips. He watched as the water quickly became still, then refoamed and rewarmed as it returned to a bubble bath once again.

The Doctor chuckled in appreciation for the technology hidden in the tub. “That’s why I haven’t left,” Cass remarked, opening her eyes.

He was slouched so that only his chest and upper body was visible. That caused his knees to be raised, almost poking out of the water. Had anyone told her, one day a Time Lord would invade her bathtub and she wouldn’t kill him instantly, she wouldn’t have believed them. Instead those old eyes of his stared at her, studying her.

“What?”

He smiled, reminiscing, “You remind me of one of my companions. Her name was Anji. She liked to take long baths. Once, we accidentally left her in the TARDIS because she refused to get out of the bathtub.”

“I promise I will get out soon. I’m just relaxing, no need to rush,” Cass insisted, anger simmering beneath her tone.

The Doctor’s hands lifted in surrender. “Tell me about yourself, Cass. I know so very little about you. Why are you always so angry?”

"If you knew what I’ve seen, you wouldn’t have to ask," she snapped. "But what do the Time Lords know about those suffering? The only thing you are concerned about is your planet. What about all those lost in the beginning days? No planet stood a chance against the Dalek Fleet or the Jaws or the Nightmare Child. I saw entire worlds eaten, the laughter of the Horde of Travesties…”

"All hellish, I know, but who are you, Cass? How did a human get this far out in space and time? No human being should ever have been caught up in the Time War."

She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. I don’t want to talk about it.” Closing her eyes shut, she ignored his presence and the lull of sleep returned.

It was some point later when the water moved vigorously around her, she awoke. With sleepiness thick in her voice, she snapped at him, “You better not be doing anything inappropriate over there.”

Upon opening her eyes, she saw that he was looking at her with an arched brow with a martini shaker in hand. “Chocolate martini?” he inquired.

He handed her a glass and filled it. Taking a long sip, she made a noise of approval and didn’t set the glass down until she had finished. She watched him reach over the tub and hold up a violin. Shaking her head, she chalked it up to this being an another one of his impossible ways.

Letting herself drift to the lullaby he played, she found it easier to sleep.

As her mind slipped to another place, she felt the rays of a warm tropical sun hit her face. The world around her was paradise with the exception of the feeling that she was being watched.

The Doctor was with her in her mind, watching her.

“Are we on Kantra?”

“Yes,” she murmured, all her muscles relaxing. “I grew up in Paradise, an endless summer. I wanted to be amongst the stars.”

She knew it was a dream but she could feel his fingers skim across her shoulders.

“You are now.”

“But for how long? How long can we keep running?”

He chuckled in her ear. “Endlessly. We can live in one solitary moment forever.”

“Why? How can we live with both our fates hanging over our heads?”

“The best we can. Wake up Cass, we should move on.”

With the sudden motion of someone shaking her arm and with a gasp, snapped out of her dream state. In reality, the Doctor had gotten up and redressed. Cass stood and was immediately encased in a towel as the Doctor dashed around her. Once she stepped out, he left the room, allowing her to dress.

She dressed, not wanting to keep the Doctor waiting, since he was quite impatient. She never knew Time Lords could whine so much and that was due to her own ignorance of them. It wasn’t an endearing trait but he made up for it in enthusiasm for life.

He smiled at her as she came out, leaning against the wall. He offered her his hand but she didn’t take it and walked alongside him. She tried not to notice the disappointed frown when she refused to take his hand.

It seemed his hand wasn’t used to being refused by females.

The pair wove through the building and out onto the planet. It was pleasing, very serene, like everything else around them. Cass was reminded too much of home. Paradise was lovely but it was not for her. Noticing her distraction, the Doctor tugged at her wrist and lead her to the docks.

He had set up this arrangement while she was relaxing in the spa. “Happy now?” she asked, as he started the engine of the TARDIS.

"Very." he replied, flashing her a smile. The bastard was charming and it was starting to break down her defenses. Maybe it was because she was getting to know him or maybe it was because she could see all his faults but still knew the good within him.

In an instant, the sun became so bright that she shielded her eyes. Through her hands, she glanced over to see the Doctor had pulled goggles out of nowhere. He was still leading her to what she could only imagine was The Island of Light.

It seemed like only moments had passed when he switched off the engine. His feet appeared in her covered vision and he was lifting her up with surprising ease. She was about to protest when he put her down and the light slowly dimmed.

"Cass, welcome to the Island of Light."

As her vision adjusted to her surroundings, there was a sudden feeling consuming her. She swayed and the Doctor’s hands caught her. Due to the overwhelming sorrow that consumed her in the midst of the light around her, she allowed his hands to remain in hers.

"Doctor…" she began. "I-"

"I know. It’s the Island. It brings forth all those feelings. All that pain and anguish you carry, will be released. Just let it out, it’s why we’re here."

Cass looked at him and wanted to slap him in the face. “You brought me here for some kind of alien therapy?!”

"Not just you, Cass, not just you."

"What do you mean?"

He released his grip on her and walked ahead. With a huff she was on his heels, following him. Soon her own overwhelming pain consumed her weighed her down on her to the point she knew she could not take another step.

"Do you know anything about how Time Lords die?”

Cass paused. “What?”

"Cass, when I die, I’m not going to dead.” he replied, gesturing downwards at himself.



“Me, the person whom you see before you, this man will die.” he said, pointing a finger at his face. “But a new man always walks off with a new body and face. And he will carry me as a part of him.”




That was it, that was the last straw for her.

"Excuse me?! You mope around about how you’re going to die, just like me and you get to live on? How is that fair? HOW? You lie! You lied, you’re not going to die! Was all this just to drag me on?! I would rather die!"



"No! Cass! No! I die! Another man lives. It’s regeneration. My memories remain in his, but I’m dead. This face you see before you will be gone.”

Cass fell to her knees. “How is that fair? Stupid me, I’m just a Kantrian, my life doesn’t matter. Doesn’t matter how we die as long as we do! Be it as a Dalek slave or in the War.”

The Doctor dropped down before her, placing his hands on either side of her face. “Cass, you matter. I saved you for this short time because I needed to run away from death. I don’t want to die, but I made the choice to because of you!”

"Me?! Why blame me?! Why did I matter to that much to you? You JUST met me? What’s wrong with you?" she demanded.

The Doctor leaned forward, pressing his forehead against hers. The immediate thought of headbutting him had dissipated at the tender action.



"Because you remind me of so many I’ve met before. People who have traveled with me, people that I have loved. I wanted to save us both, so I didn’t have to face the fact I was committing suicide! Cass, I didn’t have to die. I could have left you, I could have run, but I wouldn’t. You broke me. You broke me. You made me realize I was fighting a losing battle. I couldn’t run from the war anymore. I need to do what I have dreaded doing. I have to fight, I have to end it, Cass. The entire fate of the universe is on me, and I have to make a choice.”

"Is that supposed to comfort me?"

He laughed unhappily. "I had hoped. Cass, I want to cherish my time with you and I’d hoped that you’d understand and do the same. But please, I must ask for your forgiveness. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I’ve been walking on thin ice with you. I’ve never had to be so open with any other Companion. I want us to be comfortable and at peace with one another. If we aren’t, if we don’t, then what’s the point of using this time that we have together?”

She felt him lift his head up and place a small, light kiss on her forehead.

She asked, "What choice do you have you have?"

"The War, Cass, I will be the one to end it. It will all end in fire and I will commit genocide! You want the Time Lord’s to burn because I promise you they will! Does that make you happy? Does that put you at ease? That I have suffered so much that after this life I will kill all my kin and watch my world burn and I will be the last?!"

Cass took in all he said and it took a moment to find her voice. “Perhaps. Is it for the greater good? Is it to stop the war?”

"Yes."

She replied, “Then yes. It does make me happy because the whole of the universe will survive. That our deaths will not be in vain and the death of so many will not be forgotten. There would be purpose again, not endless death.”

This time she reached for him. She could feel him shiver as her hands came to rest on either side of his face. His whole body stiffened as he inhaled shakily. “I will become a monster and it’s odd that it pleases you so.” he whispered, tears racing down his cheeks.

When she spoke, a tremble ripped through him and she pulled him closer. “You will not be a monster, but a hero.”

They sat there in the sand, cradling one another. His cries shook him, seeing what he would become. The glimmer of hope, dim as it was, but it remained there. That thought eventually soothed him enough that his sobs faded away as he laid his cheek against Cass. Looking up at her, he reached up and wiped the silent tears that traced her face.



-5-
I never thought…




I never thought I’d be here, not in a million years. But here I am.

I am on a little planet called Earth, favored by the Doctor. I am in the small bed we are sharing, waking as the sun rises.

I never thought I would be willing to share a bed with a Time Lord.

I never thought I would start to care for him. I can tell now when he sleep and when he lies awake. He hardly sleeps but right now, from his breathing patterns, I can tell he’s asleep. He trusts me not to kill him in his sleep.

We both know I don’t have the heart for it, not anymore.

I slip out of bed, heading to the bathroom and then downstairs to make some tea. On the off chance he wakes, I prepare a cup for him. I head back up, pushing open the door to find him now on his back, taking up most of the bed. I set down his cup on his side table and return to my side.

He opens his arms to me and I crawl in bedside him as best I can. Making sure my cold toes touch the exposed flesh of his leg, he grunts.

A small smile appears on his ruggedly handsome face. “Good morning, Cass.” His voice is a soft murmur.

"Morning."

He shifts so I have a bit more room. He is so warm against me, as I am still chilled, I savor the heat. The Doctor chuckles at this development, I know he’s reflecting on our first meeting and how we are now. I realize I was wrong. Well, at least about him. He has the same issues with the Time Lords that I share. After all, from what he told me, he is their number one pain in the arse. He and the one called The Master.

At least when I die, I will be at peace after having finally lived my dream. I will continue to run with the Doctor until he tells me it’s time. So I will cherish every moment I have. These quiet moments in silence, letting the seconds tick away in a comfortable silence between us are the ones I will never regret.

Given I’m now wide awake, I excuse myself to shower and when I return, he is still in bed, reading. I don’t know what I expected him to be reading but it is an autobiography by some woman with an obscure name I can’t even pronounce. He laughs and has such sadness in his eyes as he remarks. “Just call her Peri, I did.”

"Why does she bring you such sorrow? Is she a friend?" I ask.

He nods. “Yes, she was a companion in two of my lives and is a reminder of why the Time Lords should be stopped. Just because she was human they let her die and then proceeded to make a mess of her life. There are currently five different versions of her in time right now, all living the same damned abusive life. That is something they could have changed, should have changed. I should have when I had the chance, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t change her from the person I knew and loved.”

"What are you going on about?"

"Peri has lived and died more times than I’d rather admit. One of the times I had the liberty of piecing her together myself, rebuilding her mind and body, literally. I could have taken away every trauma, every scar. But if I had, she wouldn’t have been my Peri anymore. My poor, poor Peri."

He sits in quiet reflection of the woman. He lifts the book, guesting to the picture of the woman on the back. She is beautiful and given the outrageous title, she seems to have a quirky sense of humor.

"Is that the curse of traveling with you?" I ask, I meant it as a tease but it doesn’t sound like a joke. The grave look that crosses his face confirms that horrible fate that usually lay in store for those he cares for.

Oh hell, I think I made him cry. His eyes are glistening and for a moment he is so beautifully pained I cannot look away. Damn his handsome face. “Yes. So many suffer, especially those I loved. Though I know they would do it again and again just because they love me too. It hurts me to see their pain and drives me to protect them, protect the world, to be…I don’t even know.”

"A good man? A Savior?" I inquire.

He inhales, each pull of air was shaking. “Never thought I’d hear you say that…you’re not planning on killing me and going on living without me?”

"Nah. As long as my death means something, I don’t care when I go now."

The Doctor places his hand on my cheek, locking his eyes with mine. “It would have always affected me Cass. I catch a glimpse now and then of what I will become and I will carry your warrior spirit with me for a whole lifetime.”

Damn him and his sweet words. “Well, don’t I feel special?”

"You should." He smiles.

I reward him with a light punch to whatever soft flesh I can reach. “Don’t go being all charming now.” I warn.

"That can’t be helped, it’s who I am."

I roll my eyes. “You and your Time Lord ego.”

Another grin lights his face. “What about you Cass? I’d say you’re being human but I know you’re not. I’ve yet to see anything different between you and a human being.”

I laugh. “If I were one of your precious humans, you’d be in love with me now, eh?”

"Perhaps. I’m more intrigued with what you are currently. What makes your race so special, I must admit, I cannot recall much about them."

"Survival. I can adapt to most of my surroundings, and there’s one other thing but you’re never going to know what that is," I tell him. "A girl’s gotta keep some secrets, even in death."

The Doctor laughs. “Alright, alright, you win for now.”

He goes silent as he begins to read again and I watch as he flips the pages. His face becomes more distraught as he learns what Peri has experienced in this life and from the tears that leave his eyes, it’s not good. At one point a sigh leaves his lips, a soft one which is followed by the words. “I’m so sorry.”

I scoot up and read over the page, seeing that she references doctors. At first, not him, regular doctors but then drops ‘The Doctor isn’t always there to save you’. She proceeds to inform the readers, that the human healers informed her she was unable to have children. Her abuse at the hands of her beloved cost her a dream she held so dear.

That strikes me, the poor woman, but she makes it clear she wants no pity. It is why she uses her fame to help women, to help people, so they do not suffer like she did. She is a hero, a protector, just like him. In that moment I see what he does to those he loves. It’s not just pain……well sometimes it is, but it is also empowerment and hope. He brings them hope…I should know.

I never thought I’d want to change time, to change my fate.

As he finished the book and sets it aside, he looks at me. “May I?” he asks and I nod. He wraps his arms around me and holds me for sometime. It didn’t matter how long, all that matters is that he has chosen me to become his rock, as were all his previous companions.

Guilt floods me because our looming death is my fault. Our borrowed time is due to my anger and fury and had I just ran with him, we would still be alive.

I never thought I would regret the monster I had become in that moment.




-6-
Sometimes it was better not to follow your own destiny.


"Sometimes it is better not to follow your own destiny." the Doctor said in a charming voice serene and carefree, before casting a look back to Cass.

They were strolling through a street market. A brilliant sun shone upon them, while the Doctor favored his usual outfit, Cass had chosen her white dress again. Instead of bringing back those dark feelings of their first adventure, he reflected on how beautiful she looked in white.

The woman arched her brows. “Well isn’t that our plan right now? Borrowed time and blah, blah, blah.” she said with a wave of her hand.

"Yes, but it feels nice to say that way, doesn’t it?" he asked. He was proud of his eloquence, strutting like a peacock.

Cass just heaved an over dramatized sigh. “Why are you so…”

"Charming?" The Doctor smiled wide, batting his eyes.

She laughed at the hopefulness in his tone. “You wish.”

He pouted. “You still don’t find me charming?”

"Handsome? Yes. Asinine? Very. Amusing? You have your moments. Charming? No," Cass replied.

"You’re a horrible liar, Cass." he insisted, swirling around her, making her laugh.

She grinned. “Oh, is that a fact?”

Reaching out for her, her hand slid into his. They exchanged shy smiles at the contact and as his hand entwined with hers, tugging her along. “It is.”

As they continued their leisure stroll, he noticed several things had changed. Now instead of making sure their bodies had distance between them, she strode close to him. He dropped her hand and placed his arm around her, leaving his palm on her waist as he steered her through the market. She didn’t pull away, she didn’t glare, she just kept walking.

It struck him that she was starting to like him. Since the Island of Light, since they placed everything out to one another, everything changed. Even while they rested in his flat, it felt like a home. He had naively hoped that one day she could care from him and now that she seemed to…it hurt. He knew they couldn’t keep this up, but he would stay as long as she wanted.

He knew it was possible she was falling in love with him, those who traveled with him always did. He knew she’d be no different in the end, but he never thought this would happen. He needed love before he died, before he gave up, before he became a soldier. Love gave him hope and for so long there had been none. Now he had her and that spark was returning.

That was when he decided he needed to do something, to show her how much he appreciated her. He needed to celebrate the gift of hope she had given him.

A picnic came to mind, he did enjoy them. Usually he would spend hours in the TARDIS making a meal but the market seemed to have everything he needed. He smelled food nearby, a blanket and wine in his pockets somewhere.

Grinning to himself, he had Cass select whatever food looked good to her and tugged her up an empty hill. She was groaning and moaning behind him about having to trudge up a hill in her shoes. He laughed aloud and in that moment he remembered Peri and her unsuitable shoes. She called them her hopeful shoes. It was the hope that he would take them somewhere relaxing with no running or life threatening situation. Unfortunately for them, that never happened.

Pulling the blanket and wine out of his endless pockets, he and Cass settled down. The suns were high in the sky, one bright yellow, the other pink. They lay there for a while.

He asked her about her past and her family. Those she lost, those she fought for. The more he got to know, the more he understood her pain.

That was what finalized his decision.

As he sat up, he nodded his head so she would sit up too.

“What?” she asked.

Instead of answering, he leaned over and brushed his lips to hers. Cass did not pull away, to his surprise. She pressed her lips back but quickly broke from it. She was looking at him with wide eyes as if she had never been kissed before. It was even more shocking when she leaned back over and captured his lips. This time, there was more pressure behind it, and her hands came up to cradle his face.

It took his breath away.

Cass broke the kiss again, letting her fingers trail his face. He whispered her name, leaning down to embrace her again. This time it was hungry, demanding, fierce and this time he was the one who broke it.

Placing his forehead on hers, he sighed, closing his eyes. “Thank you,” he breathed.

“For what?” she laughed.

“Giving me a chance, giving me hope…giving me this,” he confessed.

Cass didn’t reply but held him close to her as both the suns lazily crossed the sky.

-7-
Beautiful Disaster


It was morbid, sitting in the doorway of the TARDIS with disaster before them. The planet was inhabited, so there was no worry about the loss of life. They watched as the ground was ripped away. The sky darker than she’d seen before. But Cass was loving every second of it.

There was a beauty in the destruction, watching lightning fill the sky, and fire consume what brush was left. Even the smoke on this planet smelled sweet. The Doctor reached over, holding out an open bag of jelly babies. She plucked out one and tossed it in her mouth, mumbling a thank you.

Chewing on the sugary treat, she watched in wonder at the fury below. A small piece of rock shot straight for them but hovered in the force field he had put in place around them. He reached out, capturing it in his fingers and then put the rock in his pocket.

Though there was so much to see, Cass’s gaze kept flicking over to the Doctor. He caught her and grinned cheekily at her. She couldn’t help but blush, but a surge of anger raced through her.

“Do you know what bothers me?” she asked him suddenly, controlling her temper.

He ‘hmmmed’ and tilted his head, entwining his hand with hers. That was all that was needed for her anger tp melt away and she sighed before replying.

“Though I have the most beautiful sight in front of me, all this endless wonder and all I want to do is stare at you.”

He was beaming. “Finally going to admit I’m handsome and charming?”

Cass laughed. “You win, I concede. But it doesn’t stop me from being frustrated.”

Leaning over, he placed a light kiss to her temple. “I know. You do not know how I used to long to hear such talk from you when we first began. Now, now it reminds me that we shouldn’t be here…”

“I know,” she whispered. “So let’s take the time to enjoy our borrowed time…” She trailed off, leaning over to press her lips to his.

His hand worked it’s way into her hair, cradling her skull. He handled her so delicately, like she was a fragile thing. She mused that there was always a first for something. It truly hit her then that it was a first time.

She’d never felt so cherished…so loved. She cursed silently as the kiss ended and he stared at her as if she was the most precious thing.

She was in love and she realized it was never supposed to come to this. She was never meant to love a Time Lord.

She shouldn’t be here and neither should he.




-8-
The end of something better - The beginning of something worse.


The Doctor suddenly noticed how quiet Cass has become. It was an almost instant flip of the switch. She had warmed to him, even admitting her love and affection. Then the next, she distanced herself.

"Cass, what is it?" he pleaded with her.

The former Gun Crew member shook her head. “Nothing.”

He adamantly continued to ask her what was wrong and finally she exploded in the rage he had seen back when she first learned he was a Time Lord.

The rage and pain caused by his people.

"I LOVE YOU! I SHOULDN’T LOVE YOU! WE CAN’T BE HERE! How long? How long have we forced back the hand of death? Just because you’re a Time Lord doesn’t mean we should take advantage! How many more people and worlds will die because of our selfishness?"

He watched her weep, body sagging against the TARDIS console. Defeat heavy in her features as he crossed to her and gathered her face in his hands. She tried to jerk away but he captured her chin in his grasp.

"Cass, we deserved some peace and love before we perish. Yes, it is greedy and selfish but when in your life have you been? I know you’ve lost everything starting at a young age. I’ve seen that in you. You chose to talk about the paradise of your birth planet but I know what you’ve lost and who you’ve lost. You’ve lost everyone and was about to commit suicide to kill me. How could I stand by and not take advantage of my power and ship? Don’t you want to die, knowing you are loved?"

She scoffed. “You do not love me. You love the idea of what I stand for. How coming to know a Time Lord like yourself can prove you are a good one? That you can turn my hatred to love with your charm.”

He smiled at her. “Cass, you break both my hearts. I do love you. I see, and saw, in you all the things that you are and could be. I admit that I helped you out of my own greed and desires. I needed to save you. I needed to be with someone. I needed a companion because traveling alone is never for the best.”

Suddenly, she was laughing. “What a pair we make.”

He pressed his lips to her forehead. “I think we burned through most of the steps of grief in this conversation. Perhaps that is for the best.”

"We didn’t cover bargaining."

Stroking her face and wiping her tears he nodded. “Perhaps on our next adventure.”

"Sure." She murmured. "Doctor?"

"Yes?"

Instead of speaking, she wrapped her arms around him and held on tight. He knew she had so much left to say but words failed her.

He held her, knowing what the days would bring. How her rage now would turn into sorrow. She would plead for her life and for his but they would end where they began.

In death.




-9-
Desperate plea


"Cass!" The Doctor shouted into the chaos, "Cass! Where are you?" His voice, so usually even was now a desperate plea.

The lovely little planet they were on changed from a simple countryside to an all-out war zone. It was a shame since the day had been going so well. He and Cass shared a meal and a walk where they saw some of the native wildlife. The main attraction were the rainbow sheep and they always cheered him up. He had hoped it would do the same for Cass who became more sullen and withdrawn at the mere thought of what was to come.

He spied her hurrying the villagers along, hoping if they got closer to the city gates, they would be safe. She was a sight to behold, in her element. She was calm and collected, unafraid. She stood toe to toe with those who opposed her orders and they always relented to her calm logic. Cass would have been a glorious warrior had her death not intervened.

A sigh billowed from him as he knew in no certain terms was she supposed to survive. She was always meant to die. But it did not mean that he had to like it. The cost of keeping her alive much longer would start to affect the flow of time. He could feel the reapers waiting to rip through the fabric of time to consume them.

Screams from a child broke his musings and he rushed towards the little girl. As his arms wrapped around her, saving her from her death, he felt the thin veil of time rip apart. The Reapers poured through the tear in the fabric of reality.

Agony enveloped him. Saving this child, barely seven, he battled against time. A shout tore from him, to stop this, for after brief time, he would have to kill the child. He couldn’t, not by his own hand.

"No, please," he pleaded on the deaf ears of the Gods the Time Lords rarely thought about. "No."

Cass was rushed over. She saw what his reaction had done. Wrenching the child from him, the little girl screamed in terror and ran away.

"Doctor!" She snapped, slapping him out of his reverie with her hand, "Here! Now!"

"That child has to die Cass!"

There was another resounding slap. “No! We do!” She pleaded, “I don’t want to die but I can’t live like this! If this child must die…if hundreds of them have to perish, we cannot do this anymore!”

He pulled her towards him, crushing his lips against hers. Cass met his challenge fiercely and they clung to one another. Breaking it, her tears grounded him and he knew he was right.

"Come on, Cass." Stretching out his hand to her, they hurried towards the TARDIS.

As the door shut behind them, they braced themselves for the gunship that would soon materialize around them.

She opened the door, crossing the threshold. A tear fell for each footstep as she went to the deadlock which stood open for her.

"Cass."

His heartbeats faltered at the sound of her boots. Instead of the previous defeat and pain, love was the cause for his heartbreak. She looked over her shoulder as she took one final step. Slamming her hand on the deadlock the doors sealed.

There was no running, not anymore. Time to die.



-10-
The power of goodbye


What broke him more was the sight of Cass on the other side of the door. He could see her tear streaked face. This time it was more painful because he knew he loved her. The attachment he knew that could have been there and was.

She was rooted in him now as all those who that came before her. It was only now she brought the means to an end.

He could not run any more. War was all around him and he would have to play his part. He knew he had to end this and there was no other way. Cass was the catalyst he needed. What had started in fear turned to love and love became the driving force.

He would let her inspire him, let the Warrior love. He had not done so before but he had lost too much, too many by both sides. He lost companions to war and pain and those who called Time Lords their enemies and he had lost one by the action of his own people. A pointless assassination that would forever haunt him.

In their name he would fight and in their name he would do what was right for peace and sanity. He pressed his hand to the small window and called to her. Her hand came up to mirror his and he closed his eyes.

"Goodbye, Cass. Thank you." he said, restraining his emotions.

She smiled and mouthed, “Good bye…”

Like a chain that snapped, he released his hold on that second and in an instant darkness consumed him.

When he felt shock jolt through him and his eyes snapped open. He called for her though it was useless. He hoped it the crash was a nightmare and when he woke up and called for her, she would come back to him.

Numbly he listened to the Sister, letting out his snide remarks without holding back. He was already dead, there was no point being polite about it anymore. Everyone he loved dead and gone and he couldn’t shoulder the burden grief.

They brought Cass in and holding his breath, he ran his sonic over her. He wished to see even the tiniest spark of life inside her but it was too late. No one should have survived the crash and no one did. He knew his life was over, now was the time to move on. Whispering his apology to Cass, he drank the liquid given to him by the sister. He tasted metallic, like blood. It was fitting for the moment and in those seconds, he changed.

Though the fog of regeneration, the only thing he could concentrate on was Cass’s body. So still, turning cold. He got up and reached for her. His fingers traced down her cheek. He eyed the bandolier she had worn so proudly and couldn’t stop himself from taking it. He needed to carry it with him, he needed to remember her and everything they had faced together. He wanted to remember the power of their good bye and how she had shown him why he needed to fight.

He would become the personification of War itself if it meant the end of the bloodshed.

For her. For them.

For the good of all.



-The End-

This was my first run with both characters and it took a lot to get this done and was ripped apart and put back together. I do have another Cass and 8 story coming up called Still Life

Comments